Kathryn March 12th, 2011

I don’t miss high school… Not one bit! If there was anything I would say that I miss it would be that when I was in school, I saw and talked with one of my best friends everyday… But even then, I still have that friendship and although I don’t see and talk to her every day like I did then we are still good friends, we’ve just grown up a little and have our own lives to live!

Now if I could tell you what I DON’T miss about high school… the list is LONG! But at the top of the list would have to be the drama….

I remember a girl at school being SO upset that her best friend had a boyfriend and that, as she put it, ‘he has changed her.’ Because of this issue that she had (or that she created, depending on which way you look at it) she lost her best friend – and in the long run it probably cost her a lot of friends… Thinking about it now I remember that she had the same issue with at least one of her other friends. At the time I had never been in a relationship, and yet I could still see that this was an over reaction. Now, probably 9 or 10 years on I think about that situation and have learnt an important lesson.

The view of teenagers, and perhaps the view of the world, is that you should never allow another person to change who you are. There is some merit to that. You should never allow another person to lower your standards, or tell you that you are less than what you are. When that start to happen and you start to believe it, that’s when trouble starts and you can end up in a very dark place. You can’t see the way out and looking at it to the extreme it can destroy your life…. BUT… You SHOULD allow other people to help you raise your standards and help you feel important, loved, and like the child of God that you are. When that happens then you reach new heights, achieve goals greater than what you thought you would ever be able to achieve and what is most beautiful about that is that you can then lift those around you.

I’ve never been, and probably never will be, a big fan of change…. my husband and my mum will testify to that…. But I have come to know how necessary and beautiful it is. It’s change that allows us to become and be better than we were yesterday, I’m sure that any one who has suffered from an addiction will testify to that. It’s change that allows us to make new friends, ask anyone who’s had to move interstate or overseas and met a friend who they will be forever grateful for! It’s change that allows us to gain knowledge and experience, ask someone who has lost their job and taken the opportunity to go back to uni and start a new career! But the biggest thing I’ve learned is this – It is change that allows a couple to create a happy and successful marriage. I love my husband and my son, and because I love them I am continually wanting to be a better wife and mother. I can’t do that if I don’t change…. it’s impossible. If I chose to not let my husband change me and he chose not to let me change him then we would be heading in different directions, but as partners we are continually making the changes necessary to reach our goals.

By asking someone not to change we are ultimately asking them to stop growing and learning…. and why would we want that for a friend? I am not in touch with my friend from high school anymore but I’m sure that she has changed, and I hope that somewhere she has learnt that allowing someone to change isn’t such a bad thing!

I hope that I never have and never will try to stop anyone making positive changes in their life. If someone ceases to change then they also cease to grow, and to me that is one of the saddest things of all.

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Kathryn March 10th, 2011

So I have been trying to think of things I can blog about that can actually be useful to people… where they can get good ideas and use them to make their own lives that little bit happier, smoother, and stress free. I’ve had a couple of ideas and I’ll probably be posting blogs regularly on varying subjects… but for today (and possibly the rest of the week…. or month….) it’s about money.

The reality is that we all need money. What varies between each person and family is how much money they have – and what they spend it on. Two seemingly identical families can be earning the same income and yet be living totally different life styles. One can be happy, living within their means and saving money – the other, could be constantly stressed and in a large amount of debt. I think the difference is priorities….

So how can we be the first family, happily living within our means, and not the second, in a large amount of debt constantly stressing where the money to pay the bills will come from…. the answer is twofold. 1. Create a budget 2. Stick to it.
Most people can create a budget – look at how much you earn and then allocate where you will spend it – Easy as pie!
For me the problem lies not in creating the budget, but in sticking to it. So I’m hoping to share with you (and you share with me) some ideas on what you actually do to STICK to your budget. One area I would consistently blow the budget on is the groceries, until I changed my ways, and now most weeks I spend less than I have budgeted. My solution to this is simple, and it lies in a menu plan… here are the steps!

An example of my menu plan! You could always do it on a calendar template too!

1. A menu plan – I believe this is essential in keeping a hold on your grocery bill, I make the menu plan, get out my recipe books and make a very detailed shopping list. It also helps you look at expensive meals vs cheap meals – Try and balance these out a bit.
My shopping list will tell me exactly how much of everything I need eg. 1kg mince, 3 onions, 200g ham etc. I usually then go to the cupboard and put a mark next to the items I already have – they become the ‘optional’ items on your list (there is a reason for not crossing them off completely)
When making your shopping list remember to take into account the ‘extra’ things. One example could be if you know you will be going to dinner at a friends place and you’re bringing the dessert…. or you may have a mothers group you attend, where you take a morning tea.

If you’re in a position to do this – Plan for left overs! With only 2 adults and 1 toddler to feed I find myself preparing some meals in quantities larger than we need. Any meal that I cook that could do us for 2 meals, takes up a second night in my menu plan. If you don’t like eating the same thing 2 nights in a row, that’s no worries! Just put it in the freezer! It seems cheaper if you’re ‘cooking’ 2 or 3 less meals a week. For me it also means that on the nights that are busy and you need to be able to dish dinner up quick – you know it’s already done, and it’s not a major stress.

This supermarket?

or this supermarket?

2.Search the catalogues – I go online and look at the Coles AND Woolworths catalogues (and sometimes foodland)- I find the things that I have on my shopping list that are on special and make a note of all of them. I’m lucky enough to have both a Coles & Woolies at my shopping centre so I don’t have to go to 2 different chopping centres to do my shopping.

Time to shop!

3. Do the Shop! – I go to Woolies (cos that’s where I prefer) and shop! When shopping I try to look at ALL the choices available and often will try and purchase the cheapest product (I love looking at unit prices!) There are a couple of things that I choose not to buy in home brand but most of the time the Coles or Woolies branded items are just a good as the ‘brand name’ items. As I go through the supermarket I’ll often use my phone to calculate as I go – that way there’s no surprise when i get to the register! If I’m over budget it gives me the chance to put back the ‘luxury’ items that I picked up along the way (I know it would be better not to pick them up at all – but that’s another story) When judging whether you’re over budget don’t forget to take into account that you still have to go to Coles and get the specials there, you may have to get meat from the butcher, or fruit and veg from a F&V shop.

The dangerous machine!

4. The Register – Another BIG key in keeping under budget! When I get to the register I use EFTPOS and ask for change from the FULL AMOUNT of the grocery budget (ie. If you budget $300 a fortnight for shopping and your total for the Woolies shop is $130 then you should walk out with $170 in your purse/wallet).
I then move on to the rest of my shopping, such as the specials from Coles, the butcher, fruit & veg or the bakery and pay for it all with the cash. Once that is all done I know that whatever cash I have left in my purse has to last me the rest of the fortnight.

In your hand!

5. Cash – I shop for my F&V weekly – so by the time I have done all my other shopping I know that whatever is left in my purse has to get me my F&V for the next week, as well as additional milk, bread etc. I find that with having the cash there, every time I spend it I evaluate how much I still have there and what I’m going to need it for, which helps… I can’t help but see how much I left in my purse.

The rest is up to you!

6. The end of the week/fortnight/month. – Here’s the choice – when you have leftover grocery money at the end of the fortnight WHAT DO YOU DO WITH IT!? -
a. Go back and build up your food storage! Purchase items that are going to keep for a long time and that you use regularly- pasta, rice, flour, shampoo , conditioner etc. or items that are on special. Even better – buy in bulk if it’s going to work out cheaper…. Food storage is wonderful and something I need to work on! It’s so nice to have it there to fall back on for those weeks where you don’t get to shop on your usual ‘shopping day’ or you need to cut back somewhere because a large bill has come in.

b. Spend it on something nice cos you feel good you’ve got money left over – I wouldn’t do this every week, but every now and again it’s nice to give you and/or your family a treat – Buy a DVD, go out for icecream, have a movie night with popcorn and chocolate! The options are endless

c. Save it – Even if it’s $5, empty your purse before you go to do your next shop! Put in the coin tin or in the bank! You will then have the extra cash to go towards bills, saving for a house, clothes the kids need, parking change etc.

The choice is yours, and depending on how much you have left you could save some AND spend some

In the end it comes to exercising self-control! To begin with it is really hard but if you are strong enough and can stick to it for just a few weeks, somewhere it switches and you see opportunities for saving everywhere. I now find that I enjoy looking for ways to spend money and feel a great sense of accomplishment when at the end of the fortnight I still have money in my purse that I can go back to the shops with! It’s also nice to know that if we have a short week and I need a few extra dollars, it will be there!

So… what do you do to help yourself stick to your budget?

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Kathryn March 3rd, 2011

Today I am grateful for the small, seemingly coincidental things in life that brighten our day. After I put Josh to bed this evening I had to go out and pick up something I had left at Grammy and Papi’s. On the way home I made a spur of the moment decision to stop at the chapel and print something off that I needed for my calling… I thought about just doing it the next day or on Sunday but in an effort to stop procrastinating I decided to stop on my way home. As a result I was able to see a dear friend who I haven’t seen for a couple of months. It was totally unexpected for both of us… we both had things to be doing and literally only stopped for about 2 minutes… about long enough to say ‘It’s so good to see you’ ‘What are you doing here!?’ and ‘Anyway, I have to go’ – but it made my day, and I’m glad I made the decision to stop when I did. On the way home I was thinking about how glad I was to see her and how I could have just as easily not seen her.

I have been one who through the years may not have followed an impression that could have blessed someone else’s life…. Do you know the kind I’m talking about? The kind where you have the impression to call someone and you ignore it, for any number of reasons, only to find out later they really needed to talk…. Or maybe you felt impressed to offer someone a lift to a meeting, you explain the prompting away because they have a car or someone else usually picks them up, then you find out they didn’t come because they didn’t have a lift…. We all regret those situations and regret not being able to be a blessing to someone else.

I had never considered before, the possibility that our Heavenly Father may give us an impression, for seemingly no other reason, than to bring a smile to our face…. I had never thought about his love in that way …. He loves us enough to suffer for us, to comfort us in our distress, to give us counsel and guidance, create a wonderful plan for us…. AND to create a situation, allowing for a chance encounter between two friends just because he wants to see you enjoy life and be happy.

To some it may have been pure coincidence…. and perhaps it was, but if nothing else it has given me a new perspective on our Father’s love.

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Kathryn March 2nd, 2011

I tried to write a blog last night… and it just wasn’t working…. I had ‘writers block’ and just couldn’t seem to figure out where I was heading. So today I decided that instead of writing my own blog I would share someone else’s blog with you!

There is a blog that I visit regularly called ‘The Pioneer Woman‘ she blogs about many different things including cooking (…mmmm the food – So good!), homeschooling (brave woman!) and life on the ranch…plus she’s always good for a little humour. Anyway I came across a blog that she wrote called ‘Ten Important Things I’ve Learnt About Blogging’ I had already written a couple of blogs when I read this, but it inspired me to keep going and strengthened my resolve to blog regularly, and about anything.

The way her blog seems to have grown is incredible. I’m sure that when she started she didn’t imagine she would reach the heights she has. She holds all sorts of competitions, and has been on several morning talk shows. When she holds a competition she will receive atleast 20,000 – 30,000 entries…A far cry from the 70 odd people that visit this blog!

I would love to be able to create a blog, even half as good as hers… it’s just a matter of finding something that I can write about – and then knowing how to show it to the world!!! – any ideas!?

To me she seems a wonderful example of dedication and not being afraid to succeed. I know I have missed opportunities to succeed, because I was afraid… afraid of what others may think, afraid of the unknown, afraid of the heard work it’s going to take to get there, or being afraid of what what I would do if I actually did succeed… the list of fears that prevent us from doing things goes on and on. But perhaps one of the biggest fears that has stopped me, is the fear of putting my heart and soul into something – because if I fail, then it seems to be so much more devastating and painful. I’m slowly learning that it’s ok to take a risk – put your energy and heart into it – and if it doesn’t work out then you pick your head up and push forward. It’s an opportunity you have created to learn something, so take that lesson and move forward. In the end I know I won’t regret the lessons that I learnt…but I will regret the opportunities I missed.

You can't always control the wind, but you can control your sails.

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Kathryn February 26th, 2011

It’s true…. I have become a member of the Bonds Baby Bandwagon….

Over the past few weeks on Facebook I have seen many links appearing, saying
“I just entered my little bub into the 2011 Bonds Baby Search. See how cute ‘insert childs name’ looks and remember to vote when the polls open on 28/02/2011″

I debated and debated …… but just for a bit of fun, I entered Josh in the competition! I would love you to go to the Bonds Baby Search website and vote for the cutest kid… Of course it would be great if the cutest kid was my baby, but if it’s not then that’s ok! I know several others who have entered their babies as well, and I’ve looked through the gallery…. all I can say is I’m glad I’m not judging the competition!

Isn't he cute!?

Just so you know how it works – on Monday 21 March they announce the shortlist – The Shortlist is the top 50 babies as chosen by Bonds. It will be announced along with the People’s Choice Top 10. Then on April 4 they announce 10 winners, including 2 peoples choice winners.

I’m not the sort of Mum who believes in entering their child in every baby competition known to man… I am completely aware that I have rose coloured Mummy goggles on when I look at my boy, and he’s probably not as cute to everyone else as he is to me… so really I’ll be completely surprised if he comes out of this as a Bonds baby – but hey, it’s worth a try!

Also taking polls on which theme you like better… this one or the other one?

And if you haven’t already and would like to receive updates of our blog (and Dallin’s Flickr feed) by email then just subscribe using the box at the top right hand side of this post….

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Kathryn February 23rd, 2011

So I had turned off the computer, was getting ready for bed and suddenly I realised… I have a load of washing that I planned to do today, and I never did it! I also checked the draws and confirmed the fact that it can not wait until tomorrow…. I turned to my husband and he looked at me and said ‘Well you better get it on then….’
Well, there goes my early night! I now have to wait up for another hour for my washing to finish!
So I find my self with a spare hour and I’m thinking…. What to do?……Blog of course….housework will wait! And just to warn all those who can’t handle completely biased mothers who rave about their children….. stop reading NOW!

On Feb 14 my beautiful boy was 18 months old….. where has the time gone!? In some ways it feels like it was only yesterday he was born, and at the same time it feels like he has been part of our lives forever! It seems like he has always been walking, chatting to me as we drive along, standing at my feet saying UPEEEEEEE (Up please) and completely destroying my kitchen every time I cook a meal! – But I wouldn’t have it any other way!

I love watching him learn! Josh started swimming lessons in Term 4 last year, and has continued this year. I wondered how he would go getting back into the swing of things and it took a total of about… 15 mins, and suddenly he was doing twice as well as he did last term. He now kicks (something I hadn’t been able to get him to do before) and he loves blowing bubbles in the water. He now plunges his head in face first and blows bubbles. It’s even a struggle to hold him now! He just loves going under the water, and when he comes up he always has the BIGGEST smile on his face! It is such a joy to see him so happy and growing so well.

Joshua at his swimming lesson.... loving it!

Most children, and adults these days, upon picking up a camera would hold it out in front of them and expect to look at the screen to take a picture. However, as most of you know, Dallin has a digital SLR camera which requires you to look through a view finder (remember those!) to be able to see your ‘shot’ – Joshua now knows what a camera is, no matter what it looks like! He was outside one day with his Grammy’s compact digital camera, holding it up to his eyes just like his Daddy does…. how he made the connection we don’t know, but I sure think he’s a clever cookie!

Joshua having his first photography lesson...We're getting there!

He loves reading books, making animal noises, running around outside, riding his bike, blowing bubbles, running around with things over his head… He just loves life, in a way that only a child can. I often struggle to keep up with him and find things to interest him, and that’s before I even think about what I should be teaching him!
It’s no wonder he can sleep 12 hours at night, and have a nap in the middle of the day…. If I put as much energy into absorbing and living life as he does then I’m sure I would need it too!

Children are such a joy, whether they are your children or not…. I love my nieces and nephews like they’re my own and am (almost) as proud of their accomplishments as their parents are! If you have the opportunity to be a part of a childs life, grab it with both hands and use it for good. You may be a parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, friend, teacher….. but whoever you are you can guarantee there is a child watching you, so be careful what you do! Yes, they’re hard work but the love you receive in return it more than worth it…. Let alone the joy you receive from watching them grow and learn. Love a child – the rewards are priceless.

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dallin February 2nd, 2011

Just Starting Out

Originally uploaded by D@lbo

Last night as I was doing some Wii Fit and Kathryn was organising and ordering some photos, we realised it was exactly one year since I had received my DSLR. So, in honour of my photographic journey over the past years, and especially this last year, I wanted to highlight this photo – the beginnings of Joshua’s photographic journey.

Ok, sure, he has a few issues of technique to sort out. But I think he’s doing marvelously well for picking it up by observation only. I’m actually quite impressed that he made the link between Grammy’s camera (this pink one) and mine (which requires looking through the viewfinder).

Joshua will be 18 months old in a couple of weeks. It’s hard to imagine where all that time has gone – it has been so quick and so wonderful.

I just wanted to put in another reminder about my flickr photostream. I’m trying to upload photos there regularly. But the best way to keep up (if you want to keep up ) is probably through RSS. I’ve set up a feedburner feed which combines my flickr feed and this blog, so you can keep up with all things Howes at one convenient location. If you don’t use RSS (including things like Google Reader and iGoogle homepage) then you can even subscribe by e-mail. Click on through to HowesThat Feeburner to check it out. And you’ll never miss one of Kathryn’s inspirational posts again!

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Kathryn January 27th, 2011

Isn’t it wonderful how on an ordinary day, doing an ordinary thing you can have an experience that defines you, molds you and solidifies who you are. I had one such experience today, it is something I hope stays with me forever and also something I’m sure will happen over and over again.
A friend asked for advice (on Facebook!!), and I debated whether or not to give it….. I decided it was something I felt strongly about and so began to respond to her, part of my response reflected how I feel about the divine design of families, in particular the fact that children need both a mother AND a father. I also wrote about how restricting, tiresome, and all-consuming it is to hold a grudge and then I shared with her some wonderful examples I have had in my life.
After I wrote and was thinking about the conversation, I realised how strongly I felt about these things, and then suddenly, and almost shockingly, I realised that I didn’t always feel this strongly, and that somewhere in the past 10 or so years I changed and am now a completely different person. I became overwhelmed with gratitude for the gospel of Jesus Christ and the person it allows me to be. I am grateful for the many people who helped me change and who have made me a better person by their example.
As I’ve grown older, I have heard, and probably said, many times how I don’t really feel any different to when I was 17 or 18. Well today, that has never been farther from the truth. I feel that if that girl were before me today, I wouldn’t recognise her.
Today I have become so grateful for the fact that as human beings we are in control of our lives. If we want to change, we can. We have the ability to master our selves. We can decide who we want to become and through work, effort, and patience, we can become that person. How amazingly grateful I am that I am not the same person I was. If I was then I have no doubt that I wouldn’t have the amazing husband and son that I have today. I would not be secure in my knowledge of families and their role in our eternal existence.
Right now I am more grateful than ever to know who I am, where I am going and what this life is all about. I know what matters most, and I will treasure that for now and into eternity.

Somewhere in those years I decided who I wanted to be and I made the change. Today I woke up and realised that I AM that person – what an amazing experience that has been. I have much more growing and changing to do, but if I make those changes I will grow.

This may not make sense to many (or any of you) but for me it has been one of those feelings and experiences that is hard to put in to words, and will stay with me forever.

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Kathryn January 6th, 2011

For a few weeks now I have been receiving emails daily from a couple of wonderful people expressing daily gratitude. As I have thought about their gratitude and the example they are setting for all those who receive it, I have reflected on the many examples I have had in my life. Some of which I would like to share with you. Each one is for a specific person although I have chosen not to name them, but you never know, it could be you!

An Example of strength and Faith

No matter what challenges life throws at you, you never give up. You keep moving forward with faith although you know the road ahead is difficult and some times very lonely. You move forward and make the decisions that you do not want to make, but you do, because they’re right.

An Example of knowledge

You are constantly seeking to learn, and you never think that there is anything that you can’t learn! You are willing to give everything and anything ago. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t but you always try… often over and over again! You may never know the profound impact this has had in my life.

An example of action and service

If ever something needs to be done you never wait for someone else to do it, or put off doing it your self. You get straight to work and get the job done! Even more than that you are so often doing that ‘something’ for someone else. An example I hope not only I but also my children can follow.

An example of quiet strength and humility

Words can not describe how I feel when I think about how our friendship has blessed my life. You never complain. There have been times when I have come to you in the hopes that I can offer you some comfort, when I know you are going through a hard time, and yet I come away sure that you have just lifted me much more than I could have done for you. You are constantly serving, and such a beautiful example to so many people… Yet I think you often don’t see just how beautiful you are inside and out!

An example of charity

What else can be said!? You are always doing something for someone else, and always so mindful of others… if only there were more people in this world as mindful and considerate as you.

An example of motherhood

This one applies to many more than one, but with one in particular in mind, you are an example of complete devotion to motherhood. Not much more can be said but that you are an amazing mother, and I strive to have as much devotion to motherhood as you do.

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dallin June 27th, 2010

Lunar Eclipse

Originally uploaded by D@lbo

In the game of Hearts, Shooting the Moon is a risky and tricky strategy which can pay off very well, or have dire consequences if the desired result is not achieved.

Fortunately, taking photos of the moon does not come with such disastrous consequences, but it can still be quite tricky to do. The moon is very bright, but surrounding it is complete darkness. Digital cameras try to measure the light across the whole scene to get a properly exposed picture. Unfortunately, with such an unbalanced scene, this means the the moon will be very over-exposed, and retain almost no detail.

This is one occasion where shooting in Manual mode (if available) is almost the only way to capture a reasonable picture. The camera wanted to take this picture with a shutter speed of 1/15th of a second. Even with image stabilisation, there is no way I could even get a clear picture fully zoomed in (at 250mm) with that slow a shutter speed (I need to get a tripod!). But, the moon would also have been completely blown out with no detail in it.

To capture this shot I had to increase the shutter speed to 1/640th of a second – 40 times faster than what the camera thought would be good! For those photographers out there, that’s just over 5 stops less light. Exposure compensation on my camera only let’s me adjust by 2 stops (up or down), so without dialing in all of my own values in Manual mode, I wouldn’t have been able to get anything like this. Looking at the settings now, I probably should have adjusted the Aperture, but that’s a story for another day.

Earlier in the evening I also caught this image of the moon rising over the clouds.

I was in a rush when I took this, so I didn’t have time to adjust the settings as I’d have liked to, and the pic isn’t as good as it could have been. That said, it was a very beautiful moment, and I was fortunate to see it and have my camera on hand to capture it, even if the capture isn’t perfect.

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